I know what you've been doing – trying to get out in private. Well, I'm here to let you know that your secret is out. I'm also here to tell you that I'm not mad. In fact, I'm kind of turned on by it. You can't help but be a bit embarrassed, but don't be. I'm not here to lecture you or be a disciplinarian. I'm here to take over. You see, as your step-mom, I think it's my right to take control.